During my first marriage we celebrated every holiday and birthday at home with family.  We only went out to dinner once a year (his idea not mine) on our anniversary.  It was always a big deal for me because I like getting dressed up to go out, even if it was only once a year.  We always went to the same restaurant.  The food was only second to the atmosphere.  An old rustic tavern with fireplaces and tables made out of trees.  Vintage iron tools hung on the walls surrounded by old-fashioned pictures of pioneers and railroads.  The wait staff were always warm and wonderful, and it seemed everyone checked their frustrations and stress at the door.  Amber colored lightbulbs gave way to an Ansell Adams kind of feeling.  I loved it.  Once when I asked if he wanted to go out to dinner, he replied “It’s not our anniversary.”  …

My second marriage was full of surprises and we went out to dinner randomly, for no reason at all.  For our anniversary we would incorporate dinner, dancing, movie, hotel, etc. depending on how much time we had, and what was on the agenda at the time. 

I started thinking about anniversaries because two special friends will be celebrating 35 years of marriage next week.  I’m so impressed.  They have a special language all their own that doesn’t include words. They just look at each other and communicate.  They’re happy and content with themselves and each other.  I envy that.  They grew together as one.  They’ve got each other’s back.  When they look at each other, they still genuinely smile with affection and admiration.  You can’t help but to feel the love that permeates the air when they’re around.  They’re never too far from each other’s sight.  They like and love each other.  They surprise each other with little things.  They’re comfortable surrounded by people and animals, or just being alone.  They deserve each other.

It’s rare to find someone who wants the same things as you do.  I’ve not been successful in that area, and I’m fully aware that scenario may never happen.  I had two chances… I had a good run.

Happy Anniversary my friends.  Cheers to another 35 years!

 

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